My Mother the Fish Killer
My parents recently moved into a new rental home with a giant aquarium filled with tropical fish. The owners asked my parents to care for the fish because the aquarium was too difficult to move.
My mom called me yesterday, totally traumatized. ALL the fish had died, all of a sudden.
Here is how the conversation went:
Me: What?! All the fish are DEAD!?! What happened?
Mom: Yep, they're all dead. I didn't know why they kept dying!
Me: Did you tell the owners?
Mom: Yes, I felt so bad, but the owner was supposed to come over for the last couple of weeks to teach me to maintain the tank...and he never did! So I was feeding them, but I didn't know if I was supposed to do anything else! Then they all died!
Me: So what happened?
Mom (stricken): The owner came over, and we figured out that the water level dropped, so the little tube pumping oxygen into the water didn't reach the water line anymore...they all suffocated to death.
Me: Oh my god.
Mom (sounding upset): I was so upset. I was really traumatized. But I didn't know. I mean, he never told me what to do with the tank, and it happened so suddenly!
Me: What kinds of fish were these?
Mom: Hmeurmeummmmeuunnmmmm
Me: Uhhhh....mom, are you alright?
Mom: Hummehrehummmeummm
Me: Ummmm....mom?
Mom: That's the name of the fish!
Me: What the heck!
It turns out the name of this fish is ACTUALLY: humuhumunu Unukuapua'a and it's a Hawaiian trigger fish.
Go figure.
My mom called me yesterday, totally traumatized. ALL the fish had died, all of a sudden.
Here is how the conversation went:
Me: What?! All the fish are DEAD!?! What happened?
Mom: Yep, they're all dead. I didn't know why they kept dying!
Me: Did you tell the owners?
Mom: Yes, I felt so bad, but the owner was supposed to come over for the last couple of weeks to teach me to maintain the tank...and he never did! So I was feeding them, but I didn't know if I was supposed to do anything else! Then they all died!
Me: So what happened?
Mom (stricken): The owner came over, and we figured out that the water level dropped, so the little tube pumping oxygen into the water didn't reach the water line anymore...they all suffocated to death.
Me: Oh my god.
Mom (sounding upset): I was so upset. I was really traumatized. But I didn't know. I mean, he never told me what to do with the tank, and it happened so suddenly!
Me: What kinds of fish were these?
Mom: Hmeurmeummmmeuunnmmmm
Me: Uhhhh....mom, are you alright?
Mom: Hummehrehummmeummm
Me: Ummmm....mom?
Mom: That's the name of the fish!
Me: What the heck!
It turns out the name of this fish is ACTUALLY: humuhumunu Unukuapua'a and it's a Hawaiian trigger fish.
Go figure.
